Baby Shower invite NO WAY

by Tammy Hall Parker on Friday, February 11, 2011 at 10:42am

At any time you become offended by reading this you can always stop and leave my notes but I tend to speak my mind and sometimes feelings get hurt, but I think this needs to be said. Let me start off by saying that I know things happen. We were all teens with raging hormones and were confused about what to do about them. But with guidance and role models to follow most of us actually had planned adult pregnancies. I know this will probably tick some of my friends off and I don't know if some of you have been in a teen pregnancy situation, if you have I understand that you had a hard time but have still raised yourself and your child and it couldn't have been easy. But my question is have we given up on teaching kids that babies should NOT be having babies? That waiting for that part of your life to start after you are grown up enough to handle everything that comes with having a baby is the way it's suppose to be? This is my rant for today because my daughter recieved an invitation this week to a baby shower being held for a child having a baby. I do mean this is a child she is not old enough to have a job but she thought she was old enough to have sex. I know this little girl about to be a mother will need help getting the things all mothers need when they have a newborn and I don't think this newborn should suffer because its mother is not able to support it on her own but I will not let my child attend nor will I let my child send a gift to this child soon to be mom. I don't even understand the thought behind the friends, family or whoever these people are that are giving her the shower that they would invite another child. It's like saying, "Oh its ok to go out and have sex as a teenager because if you get pregnant everyone will give you cute things for the baby". I was raised in a household where being pregnant or getting someone pregnant should not be celebrated but lived with because the consequences would be felt soon enough when you would give birth and have to take over a new life. This is not the first shower invitation we have recieved for someone having a baby before graduation or even during their freshman year in high school. We have got to start talking to our kids about NOT having sex not just safe sex. I am tired of hearing about how cute so and so's new baby is and when I ask where did you see it I'm told that it is brought to school because no one was home to stay with it while the mom (child) came to school. I know I'm old and things have changed but very few girls got pregnant where I went to school and those that did were old enough to get their GED and get a job. Some attended school thanks to help from family, but as soon as school was out they had to go to work not out to party unsupervised and still not caring about possibly putting themselves in the situation of having another child. In high school where the word mommy begins dating should end until you grow up. Lets not leave daddy (child #2) out of the picture either. He needs to step up to the plate along with his family who taught him to keep his business to himself and help child #1 and her parents raise this baby. These shows on t.v. make it look so dramatic and that is what alot of teenagers crave is drama. After all that is all you hear in high school is drama, drama, drama. Having a baby when you are a child is alot more than drama and friends going aww when you say your pregnant. Childrens bodies are not developed enough to carry a child. Children having children is dangerous to both mother and child. They need to be told these things before becoming sexually active. Most teen mothers have serious difficulties during pregnancy and most babies do not make it to term. In some senerios the baby comes early and ends up in a NICU unit fighting for its life. Then when they come home some of them spend the rest of thier life with learning disabilities or health issues. Some are lucky enough to carry to term and the babies are fine which I wish were the case with all babies.
We should all talk with our children both male and female. Let the males know that it is not just the girls problem but theirs too. Tell the girls about all the things that can happen when they become sexually active. Tell them the difference between love and lust. I want all children to grow up and have a chldhood to remember not have to remember how hard it was to go through school carrying a baby or an STD or both.
I hope the child who sent the invitation to my daughter is one of the lucky ones and I wish them both a good life. I'm afraid they have a long road ahead of them both growing up together. Please don't think that my children have anything to say about my opinion this is my own thoughts LEAVE THEM OUT of any problems you have with this post. If you have a problem tell me NOT them. This is my opinion and I speak my mind and at least for now I have the freedom of speech. I did not make you read this you could have stopped at anytime you felt offended as I said in the beginning. All I intended was to make mothers and fathers out there stop and think. When your child is out on a date do you know where they are who they are with and what they are doing and have you given them all the information they need to make their decisions? I hope so because I love you all or you would not be on my friend list and I only want your children to have a wonderful carefree childhood without worrying about grown up stuff. They have to deal with that soon enough anyway.